Thursday, October 30, 2008

NaBloPoMo - Ya Wanna?

Yep, it's that time of year again - when all mundane things become blog topics. Who's with me?

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Hey Hey, Ho Ho

We live near a road that runs along train tracks and trees. And this morning, each of those trees was festooned with a "Yes on 8" sign. Not for long, though, because G. got mad. He has no problem with people putting signs on their house or in their yards, but when they show up on public land that he as a taxpayer partially owns, sort of, well, he's gonna do something about it. So he took them down.

A few hours later, they were back up. G. took them down again. Tomorrow morning, I think it's my turn. Keep your goddamn homophobia and bigotry on private land.


Those of you who have been paying attention on Facebook know that I am now an ordained minister of the Christian Glory Church. I've checked it out, and it's perfectly legal for me to perform marriage ceremonies in California. Some states get all rigid about it and say you have to have a congregation to be a minister, but the beauty of the Christian Glory Church is that they believe you can be a minister anywhere, like the supermarket or the park or the street corner. It's really all about taking it to the people.

I will henceforth be referred to as Rev. Dr. Lunasea. And I plan to preside at the marriage of Big Nephew and Girlfriend, once and for all, this weekend. As things have been going, though, I need to be really careful driving before then because it would fit the pattern perfectly if I ended up in the hospital and couldn't make it. My sister would have planned a wedding banquet with no wedding. Much like the wedding trip to the Dominican Republic with no wedding, and the trip to City Hall with no wedding.

Can I get an Amen?

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Update: A's New Invention

A. has informed me that he has created a new invention for my birthday. It's an "O-ko." Oh wait - he has revised the spelling - Oacoa (still pronounced O-ko) because he remembered there is a phonogram that makes the "o" sound and must include it. (His teacher reports that he over-thinks the phonograms. Really?)

Oh good, he's going to show me what it is. It's a plastic water bottle wrapped in paper, with a black shoelace inserted in the mouth, the ends hanging out and the top screwed on to keep the shoelace in place. It goes down when you hold the shoelace ends, and then, when you pull on each string, the strings tighten and the bottle goes up. It's a toy and if we have another baby, it could play with it.

Update again: A. just said, "Mama, you know what at are all National Parks? Teepees and wheelchair rentals. And circuses. And buildings with bars in the middle." (Kid is cracking me up today.)

Turns out he was looking at the map key, in which "local events" are signified by a symbol that looks like a big top.

Birthday Surprises

A. likes to create his own gifts to give me. This year he created a crayon-holder (because I didn't have one) out of his old converse.

Note the nice, new crayons. He picked only the best.

And the boys picked out beads and strung me a bracelet. The soccer strand is from A. and the fish are from Ben. Ben originally picked out a gorilla bead but G. vetoed it.

And just because I haven't posted it yet, here is our Halloween craft for this year - salt dough ghosts:

Friday, October 24, 2008

Finally, I'm Seen For Who I Am...

How many people come home from a parent/teacher conference to this?

This is the beginning of the birthday festivities. My birthday isn't until Monday, so no worries. You've got some time.

And in the letters, we have A.'s favorite things to do with Mama, like hugging:

Cooking (note Mama's dark, dark face. That is the face of the evening meal.)

Here is A. with a hurt knee and quite a bit bigger than Mama. Although it looks like he's punching me in the neck, he assures me that I'm actually making him feel better.

Our trip to see the T-Rex skeleton at U.C. Berkeley:


Roasting marshmallows:
Going to the movie theater to see WALL-E:

How sweet is that? Ben had some drawings too, but they all looked like roller coasters. I feel loved.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Monday, October 20, 2008

The Wedding That Wasn't

So I'm sure you all remember my sister's little adventure down in the Dominican Republic in which Big Nephew (to me, Eldest Son to her) was to be married.

The Couple in Question decided they did want to get married before the baby was born and told us all that the date was set: October 20th at SF City Hall.

I met Beastie and BIL in front of City Hall where an ecumenical collection of ministers was demonstrating against Prop 8. Right on!

As we looked for Big Nephew and Girlfriend in the big rotunda, Beastie said to me, "If something went wrong and it didn't happen today, wouldn't that just fit?"

Guess what? It didn't happen. Dudes got the date wrong. They (and everyone else who took the day off to see them get married) were supposed to come in on Wednesday, October 29th. Oops. There were a whole lot of couples lined up to get married today, and if you don't have an appointment (or come in on the wrong day), you're outta luck.

So we went and had lunch at the Olive Garden anyway and called it a Rehearsal Dinner instead of a Wedding Banquet.

So the new plan is to get married in "about 2 weeks," on a weekend, somewhere outside, by someone else, but before the baby comes. The details are fuzzy, but there will be little white lights and candy in tulle, they tell us. Whether or not they will end the evening actually legally married remains to be seen. I think we should start a betting pool to help finance this shindig.

Sunday, October 19, 2008

What is With This Gas Mask?

Saw this guy's videos first on The Bloggess' site and I hope he does more because they are cracking me up. The first one is one of my least favorite bands of all time, Tears for Fears, and the second is one I actually liked at the time, Aha.

Friday, October 17, 2008

No on 8, Please

The increasing energy that the "Yes on 8" campaign is getting here in California scares me.

I have a hard time understanding how its supporters, many of whom are conservatives and therefore supposedly in favor of less government interference in our lives, can rationalize inserting a religious belief into our state constitution.

What is marriage? It's a social contract, right? If it's performed in a church, it's also a religious covenant. So making a government-sanctioned social contract discriminatory towards anyone, it seems to me, would be wrong. Making a religious convenant only available to some people is a matter of that church and its members.

Saying only men can vote is wrong and it was changed. Saying only white people can vote is wrong and it was changed. Saying white people can only marry each other is wrong. Saying only heterosexual couples can marry is right along the same lines.

I understand that some people think God has an opinion on homosexuality. I disagree, but they're certainly entitled to their beliefs. But when they start messing around with my constitutional rights, I have a problem.

Monday, October 13, 2008

The World According to Ben

In the magical thinking of the three-year-old, Ben can cause things to be simply by saying it is so.

"I did too eat my dinner." He can say this with a full plate right in front of him. It baffles me because A. was always pretty reasonable and didn't try to bend time, space and reality to suit his desires.

"But I didn't want to read books before bedtime, I wanted to draw," after, of course, we've read several books and it's time for lights out.

"But I didn't want to eat that, I wanted to eat this," after he's already eaten that.

"I'm sorry! You are not sad anymore!" said to me or A. after he's hit us. If it doesn't work, he tries again, louder, until he's yelling, "I'M SORRY YOU ARE NOT SAD ANYMORE!!!"

I say, "I know you WANT that to be true, but I'm afraid it isn't," which just sends him into panicky desperation. Maybe if he restates his wished-for reality in sobbing whines, it will come true.

It's the ultimate lesson: You can't change the past by wishing it were different. You just have to learn to deal with what's on your plate now. Like cold chicken nuggets.

And that's my happy thought for the day.

Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Look Out, Giving Tree

A. is authoring a new series of books - 1. Groing flowers
2. Changing flowers

Here is the text of Book 1:

Soon anuther flower shel gro.

In the spring it gros.

But naw it is groing into a rose.

Naw lateebugs cud rest on it and butrflis.

And it will bee happy.

And wee love flowers. Wee love peony rose daffodil dandelion and lily pansy violet daisy petunia.

The flower names are all spelled correctly because he copied it from a kindergarten worksheet.

Have a good day. Bee happy.


Update on the Halloween Parade of Historical Figures: Up until yesterday, A. was all set to be MLK Jr. I thought it was a great idea, even if I wasn't sure how we were going to turn the whitest, only red-head kid in the school into MLK Jr. I was digging the challenge.

But then at the last minute he decided to be Johnny Appleseed because "then I'll get to wear a pot on my head." As good a reason as any, I suppose. And it will be a LOT easier to pull off.

Sunday, October 05, 2008

"Stop Screaming, I Have To Take a Picture..."

Yesterday we made homemade slime from this kit that A. received for his birthday:

You can also find the recipe in these books:

I'm going to review the whole thing on my other blog, but for now let's just say: don't let your kid put the gunk on his/her head.

Oh yes they did.

Friday, October 03, 2008

24 More Shopping Days Until My Birthday

I've had this weird desire for an apron. I'm tired of wiping my hands on my shorts. When I'm cooking, I get fancy and throw a dish towel over my shoulder and wipe my hands on that. So it's time for an apron.

I want a CUTE apron, though. If I have to do housework, and apparently I do, I want to have cute accoutrements. I despaired of finding the perfect apron for under $80, though, until I checked out etsy. Found a seller and maker of cute things who has tons and tons of fabric and is going to sew me an apron out of my choice of fabric. I chose the four Heather Bailey patterns on the left of this picture:

G's buying it for me for my birthday. I don't think the apron is available anymore, but her shop has lots of other cute custom things and she has almost every fabric available ever.

I'm heavily digging the handmade fabric bags, too. I love this from Mountain Gypsy:

What happened to Involuntary Simplicity, you ask? It's still going strong and I'm appreciating it even more. But I still like stuff I can use, want to support small crafters, and, most importantly, my birthday is coming up. Time to work on the Kaboodle list.

Thursday, October 02, 2008

Bringing a Bad Attitude to Every Table

We must travel to Portland every year in the summer, and every year for either Christmas or Thanksgiving. It's written in our marriage contract and the economy will fail and the country will lose the war in Iraq if we don't. (Hey, wait a second - those things are already happening......)

We always drive in the summer, because it's cheaper, and we always fly in the winter, because G. is afraid of driving and getting stuck on the snowy mountain pass and having to eat our children.

Except this year - this year it would cost some stupidly astronomical amount for the four of us to fly. So we're taking the train.

That's right - 18 HOURS on an Amtrak train. And that's if it's running on time. No sleeping car - sleeping cars are almost as much as flying. G. says it will be fun.


You remember the Halloween historical parade that sucks all the fun out of Halloween at A.'s school? A few nights ago he declared that he wanted to be Martin Luther King Jr.

That's right. The ONE white kid at the school (and a red-head, no less) wants to be MLK Jr.

"OK," I said gamely, "we can figure that out."

But now, after attending Kid's Night at church last night, he wants to be someone out of the Bible. Not Jesus, no, that's too obvious.

"How about Mary, Jesus' mother?" he asked.

"Sure. We could do that," I thought. That would make an awesome blog post, I thought, which is how I evaluate all my decisions. Also, it's an easy costume.

"Nah. She's a girl. How about Isaac?" he suggested.

Losing the train of thought, I asked, "Isaac? You mean Isaac Newton?"

"No, you know. Abraham's son," he answered. Oooh, there are some possibilities for another awesome blog post. Strap a table to his back, decorate it like a sacrificial altar and stick a big knife next to him.......

"Oookay. I don't think the school library has a biography of him, though. We'll have to do our own research," I told him.

He still wasn't sure. He picked up the kid's bible, turned to a random page and found King Josiah, the 8-year-old king of Judah.

BINGO! Toga, crown, and we're there. All the kid's bible says about him is that he was eight when he ascended the throne and that once he was king, he fixed some of the temples. There's a drawing of a kid with a crown pointing to some cracks in a pillar. Perfect - we'll just add a putty knife to the toga and crown. Wikipedia has a slightly different take on Josiah, but let's just pretend we didn't see that, OK?

So, for today anyway, that's what he's going to be. Unless some other kid has already taken it.

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