But Wait, There's More...

G. was getting all snuggly one night, and then he found the TTFTE classic short story, "A Crack in the Track" stuck under the pillow. He said in his huskiest voice, "I wanted to read you some passages from "A Crack in the Track"...

Which started me thinking about other kids' books that could double as erotic novels/porn. The best I came up with was "There's a Wocket in my Pocket."

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A. is stealing money. He doesn't think of it as stealing, of course, he thinks of it as going on a "money hunt," where any change he finds is rightfully his. There's some good English blood in that boy. Sometimes he even draws a treasure map.

Anyway, I think he knows that the money isn't really his, or wasn't to begin with, so he makes stuff up. Every night he wants to count the money in his teddy bear bank, and he tells whichever parent is with him that the other parent gave that day's take to him for helping Ben. He told G, "Mama gave me this money for doing chores. And I helped out Ben." Riiiiight. G. told me about it that night and I replied, "Since when does he do chores? Or help Ben?"

So I was prepared the next night when he told me, "Papa gave me this money for giving Ben a drink." I said, "Gee, we don't usually give you money for handing a drink to Ben. Are you sure that's what happened?" He stuck to his story, and we're actually not entirely sure where he's getting the money. I think he's now up to $1.80, which he says he'll hold on to until he's older.

I think if it's on the floor, it's fair game, but he shouldn't be lying about it. On the other hand, I think we've found a real motivator to get him to use the bathroom instead of his pull-up at night.

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Have I told you all about the "I Spy" game? We basically play memory with the I Spy cards. It's not easy - there are 25 matches and they're different photos with the same object - in the photo, that's a match because both cards show the clown. A. wipes the floor with both me and G. Occasionally, if he's really off his game, we'll win, but seriously, the kid is scary good.