Friday, April 02, 2004

Wiggles Analysis

We're going to see the Wiggles Live! in a few weeks. I think it's going to blow A's mind. "WTH? I KNEW there were real people inside that TV!" So, here is my take on a few of the Wiggle characters:

GregAnthonyJeffMurray: Undifferentiated Ego Mass. Although, don't you feel a little sorry for Jeff? He's so short and they don't really let him sing. No wonder he keeps falling asleep.

Henry the Octopus: The Entitled Bully. He's always ordering everyone around. "Shine, shine, shine my shoes! Rub some seaweed on my shoes!" Hey, Henry, with 8 arms you should be able to get one of them to work - do it yourself. And stop ordering that underground band around - those backup fish are going to become famous and leave you in the dust if you aren't nicer to them.

Dorothy the Dinosaur: The Co-Dependent Whiner. "Oooohhhh, the hat I made you got all wet!" I was hoping to win your affections by sucking up to you, Anthony. Because I think that's the only way I can make friends. Oh please, tell me I'm OK, over and over.

Wags the Dog: The Narcissist. But, I like Wags. C'est Bon, C'est Wags. You go, dog, do that tango.

Captain Feathersword: He's easy. The Delusional Manic. Oh, OK, you're a pirate. And people do dances with pompoms on your pirate ship. Riiiiight.

A. found his pacifier (God knows where) and handed it to me. I thought he was being so good because he knows he's only supposed to have his paci in bed. But then he walked over the sink and pointed to it. He wanted me to wash it off. Oh, OK, Suddenly-Afraid-of-Germs-Boy. Then he took it back and popped it in. So I said, "Hey, let's go put that back where it belongs." He immediately ran into the TV room and pointed to the TV - "ooohh! Oooh!" Like, "Look at Stanley! He's talking to his goldfish!" (Let me say here that "Stanley" is the show that holds A's interest the least. He's never shown any interest in it - until now). Nice try, bud.


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